When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
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Chuck Norris uses an air bag... in order to protect the inside of his car in case he stops too fast.
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Chuck Norris once won a drag race with a unicycle.
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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
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Chuck norris can kick you in the back of your face.
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Chuck Norris lit a match and ended the Cold War.
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The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris.
There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
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Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
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It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
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Chuck Norris' toothpaste doesn't have baking soda in it, it has gunpowder in it.
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Big Brother isn't watching you.
Chuck Norris is watching you!
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