When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
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Goku and Superman once had a baby his name is Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
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Chuck Norris does not cleanse himself with your everyday shower.
He uses Meteor Showers.
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Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
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Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
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Chuck Norris will never die.
The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
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The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.
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Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
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Chuck Norris can make sounds come out on his Air Guitar.
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Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.
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