Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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Chuck Norris broke a mirror and got 7 years of good luck.
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Chuck Norris can tie your hands behind your back with both hands tied behind his back.
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Q: Chuck Norris invented the internet?
A: Just so he had a place to store his porn.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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Chuck Norris designed and created two series of cars.
These are now known as Autobots and Decepticons.
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After meeting with Chuck Norris' lawyer the UFC have changed their name from "Ultimate Fighting Championship" to simply "Fighting Championship."
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If there's something strange...
In your neighborhood... Who ya gonna call?...
CHUCK NORRIS!
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The best security system for a bank is when Chuck's money is in it.
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Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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