Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.
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When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
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Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
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Chuck Norris was the Best Man at his own wedding.
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Chuck Norris thought 24 was a sit-com.
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Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
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Devil stays in hell because he knows Chuck is around, here on earth.
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Chuck Norris knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
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Chuck Norris graduated from the School of Hard Knocks with an MBA - Mega Bad Ass.
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Chuck Norris can stand the rain...
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After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris.
It was more "humane".
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