Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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When Chuck Norris breaks the speed limit, no one can put it back together again.
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PlayStation network was never hacked.
Chuck Norris just decided to play one day.
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Chuck Norris won American Idol, only using sign language.
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Chuck Norris once had a pet monkey...his name was KING KONG
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Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
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When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears.
Candyman ain't stupid.
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Chuck Norris always wins at Jenga, the tower couldn't dare to crumble.
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Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
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Only once in history has Chuck Norris snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang.
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