Joke #3268

Alex was a sports fan whose face was always either buried in the sports pages or transfixed by the television screen. One night as he lay in bed next to his wife watching a football game, she got up, walked across the room and unplugged the TV. "Hey," Alex shouted, "what do you think you are doing?" "I’m sick of sports, I’m sick of TV," she replied. "You haven’t touched me in months. We’re going to talk about sex right now!" "OK, OK. So," he asked after a moment, "how often do you think Brett Favre gets laid?"

How did the blonde die icefishing? She got run over by the zamboni!

Q: What do you call black people in a swimming pool? A: Coco puffs. Q: What do u call mexicans in the swimming pool? A: Reeces puffs reeces puffs!

The Winter Olympics. Letting white people win at sports no one else can afford to learn.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

What’s a swimmer’s favourite sport? Pool.

I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."

Once Chuck Norris swam all the oceans for 7 days and oceans got cold.

Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get taller girls?

There was an old man named Bill, and one of the things he most enjoyed was playing golf with his old buddy Fred. Bill's wife always commented on how happy he looked after a game. But one day he came home from their weekly game looking terrible and very tired. His wife asked, "What's the matter, Bill? You always seem so happy after golf and you look miserable right now." Bill said, "Well, something terrible happened. Fred had a heart attack on the first hole." "My God, honey!" said the wife, rushing to comfort him. "That must've been terrible!" "It was," he said. "All day long it was: hit the ball, drag Fred to the ball, and then hit it again..."

Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet. Squash