Joke #3306

What's the quickest way to lose 190 pounds of ugly fat? Divorce him.
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A man has came over to his wife in a request. She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants. 3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.
Vote: has 72.56 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

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How was Colonel Sanders a typical male? All he cared about were legs, breasts, and thighs.
Vote: has 26.98 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

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Boy: "You know unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy" Girl: "Why are you leaving?"
Vote: has 64.76 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

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What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
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How do men define a "50/50" relationship? We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.
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How can you tell when a man is well hung? When you can just barely slip your finger between his neck and the noose.
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Men are like......Bananas. The older they get, the less firm they are
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Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something we'd want to have dinner with.
Vote: has 51.34 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

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Why are men like blenders? You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
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Why are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half time.
Vote: has 24.26 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

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