What came first, the chicken or the egg?
Chuck Norris came first.
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Chuck Norris is proof that legends never die.
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It is a fact that Chuck Norris cannot cry, this is because his tearducts are too muscular.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked the turbines of Hoover Dam.
Since then, the Colorado River is a tourist attraction.
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Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car he walks.
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Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
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Chuck Norris doesn't smoke cigars.
He smokes smoke grenades.
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Right angles used to be called wrong angles until Chuck said, "I don't see anything wrong with them."
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If, by some incredible space-time parodox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win.
Period.
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower in the morning to freshen up.
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Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross.
Just never his own.
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