When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
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Chuck Norris doesn't expect the unexpected.
He knows the unexpected.
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When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does.
NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
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No sense in playing Clue with Chuck Norris, we know it was Chuck Norris with a roundhouse kick in any room.
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Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once soaked his beard in carbonated water.
The result is now sold as Red Bull.
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
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Chuck Norris climbed the stairway to heaven, and came back down again.
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The burning bush that Moses spoke of was actually Chuck Norris's beard!
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