When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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The tides don't change because of the moon; the sea just wants to be as far away as possible from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to breathe, the oxygen comes to him.
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Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
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Chuck Norris is ambidextrous.
He can do Roundhouse kicks with his left and right leg.
All at the same time.
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If Chuck Norris misses a roundhouse-kick, you will still die.
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Prisons don’t keep society safe from criminals.
Prisons keep criminals safe from Chuck Norris, for now.
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Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris can get breakfast at McDonalds after 11, at Taco Bell.
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Ozzy Osbourne once accidentally bit the head off a live bat - Chuck Norris once deliberately bit the head off a live pterodactyl.
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