When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Voldemort once ran into Chuck Norris.
He is now known as Harry Potter.
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World War II started because Burger King screwed up Chuck Norris' order.
Today Burger King NEVER gives you onions unless you ask for them.
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If you use Chuck Norris in a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors, you automatically win.
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Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236.
It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
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The real reason that Oprah is ending her show on television is that Chuck phoned and said "That's enough!"
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris.
After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
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In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
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It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
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Chuck Norris can alphabetize m&m's
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