Joke #3867

There was a tragic end to the water polo championships – all the horses drowned.
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What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? The NBA
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A regular Friday night poker game was still going strong well after midnight when one of the players returned from bathroom with an urgent report. "Roger, listen," he told the host, "Walter's in the kitchen making love to your wife!" "OK, that's it, guys," Roger said. "This is positively the last deal."
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"Waiter, this vinegar is rather lumpy." Waiter: "That's because they're pickled onions, sir."
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Q: How does David Beckham change a light bulb? A: He holds it in the air, and the world revolves around him.
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Yo mama's so skinny, she used a needle for a baseball bat.
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Q: Why is it so hot at Phillies games? A: Because there's not a fan in the place.
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After a 2 year study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on America's ball-related recreational preferences: The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is basketball. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is bowling. The sport of choice for blue-collar workers is football. The sport of choice for supervisors is baseball. The sport of choice for middle management is tennis. The sport of choice for corporate officers is golf. Conclusion: The higher you rise in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
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"I felt a lump in my mouth as the ball went in." - Terry Venables.
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Golfer: "I'd move heaven & earth to break 100 on this course." Caddy: "Try heaven; you've already moved most of the earth."
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On the ninth day, God said, "Let there be soccer." And it was good. Later on that day, God said, "Let there be one team to rule the others and set the standard for excellence." God said, "Let it be called the Manchester United." Later that day, God said, "Even Man U needs idiots." So HE made their fans.
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