When Chuck Norris eats teddy grahams, he craps out grizzly bears.
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When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
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Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vomit with fear.
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Chuck Norris was once in a catch 22, but he roundhouse kicked it down to to a 12 pack and literally drank his problems away.
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Chuck Norris can keep up with the Kardashians.
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Chuck Norris doesn't buy life insurance, life buys Chuck insurance.
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Chuck Norris made this sentence finish.
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Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
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Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
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