When Chuck Norris eats teddy grahams, he craps out grizzly bears.
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Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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In the game "Clue", the murder is always committed by Chuck Norris, with a roundhouse kick, in any room he danged well pleases.
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Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
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The Universe is not expanding.
It's running away from Chuck Norris.
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Google is setting up a new search engine to answer life's difficult and most complex questions with the response always being the same... Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't expect the unexpected.
He knows the unexpected.
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Chuck Norris doesn't contribute to global warming, he exhales pure oxygen.
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Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
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Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
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