In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
The entire movie of "Anaconda" was recorded inside Chuck Norris' pants.
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
Chuck Norris's computer has no "backspace" button, Chuck Norris doesn't make mistakes.
Someone tried to stab Chuck Norris in the stomach, and the knife bent on his rock-hard abs.
Chuck Norris doesn't die...he just sleep in the ground for a little bit.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Physics is bound by the laws of Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has 10 custom classes on Modern Warfare 2, and hes never prestiged.