In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
Chuck Norris can make a stop sign say go.
Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby. Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
You don't invite Chuck Norris. He invites himself.
Chuck Norris can obtain unobtainable.
Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear. The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
Chuck Norris will be the star lead in the remake of the movie "300" it will now be called "1"
Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
Three seconds after Chuck Norris was shot, the bullet came out screaming.
Chuck Norris once hit 3 touchdowns during a friendly game of full-contact bowling.