Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS.
Chuck Norris decides where he is.
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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
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Obama said, "Yes we can." Chuck Norris says, "I already did.".
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Some say that Chuck Norris is the Stig.
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Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
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What occurs twice in The Beginning, never in The End, but is at The End of Everything?
Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once played The Price Is Right.
The prices attempted to guess the numbers Chuck Norris was thinking of.
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Most kids pee their name into snow...
Chuck Norris pisses his in concreate...
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Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability.
Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse-kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back.
The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming.
They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
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Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
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When Chuck Norris talks, E.F. Hutton listens.
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