Who was the last person to box Rocky Marciano?
His undertaker.
Golf
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An amateur golfer is one who addresses the ball twice: once before swinging, and once again after swinging.
Where's the safest place to be when a bunch of white guys are playing basketball?
Under the Hoop
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits.
He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."
There’s no game like golf: you go out with three friends, play eighteen holes, and return with three enemies.
The coach says to the boxer encouragement words:
The other one will surely win, but at least look at the cameras and smile...
Q: What game does the brontosaurus like to play with humans?
A: Squash.
The stock market really plummeted today, but luckily there is a computer chip that is used to turn off the board if it gets too low.
The Cubs have the same chip in there scoreboard.
Why is basketball such a messy sport?
Because you dribble on the floor!
The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson.
"Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?" she asked the instructor.
"P-u-t-t is correct," he replied.
"Put means to place a thing where you want it.
Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing."