Chuck Norris invented black.
In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light.
Except pink.
Tom Cruise invented pink.
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Chuck Norris does not wear a seatbelt and reclines his seat before takeoff and landing on an airplane because he can.
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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The Beatles' song "HELP" was written after they met Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' jokes don't have punchlines.
They have footprints.
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Got said, "Let there be light!"
Chuck Norris looked at him and said: "Say please."
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Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
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Why did satan die before judgment day, Chuck hated him.
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Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee.
Except Chuck Norris.
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Chuck never auditioned for Walker Texas Ranger, a camera crew turned up at his house and secretly filmed him.
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