Q: What did the bird say after his cage fell apart?
A: "Cheap, cheap!"
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If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of food.
What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties?
"Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo."
Little Red Riding Hood walks through the forest and sees a wolf hunched under a tree with its ears erect and its mouth stretched in a big grimace.
She says to the wolf, "My, what big ears you have!"
The wolf keeps grimacing.
She says, "My, what big eyes you have!"
The wolf grimaces even wider, baring his teeth.
She says, "My, what big teeth you have!"
The wolf finally snaps and says, "F**k off! I'm trying to take a dump."
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How do you f*ck a fat chick?
Roll her in flour and find the wet spot.
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What's green green green green green?
A frog rolling down a hill.
You momma so stupid I see her walking the pigs down the street I'd asked "What she doing?" And she said "Going piggy back riding"!
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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?
A: Doesn't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.
How does a frog confuse you?
When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better.
What is the definition of "moon"?
The past tense of "moo"!