Why are so many blondes rushing out to get breast implants? So they don't have to pay the flat tax.
Q: How does a blonde kill a worm? A: She burys it.
How do you confuse a blonde? You don’t, they’re born that way!
Q: Why do blondes have "TGIF" on their shoes? A: "Toes go in first."
Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater? A: They went to see "Closed for the Winter".
How do you determine a blonde’s IQ? With a tyre gauge.
There were once these two blondes who were sitting around bored and alone one day. They noticed an article in the paper where they were selling bird dogs. Well they had heard that dogs make excellent companions so they went out to buy one. They brought the dog home and fell instantly in love with him. They had heard somewhere that bird dogs were smart and good at what they do. So the two blondes decided to take the dog outside and watch him do what he is was so good at doing. They tried it out a couple of times, but the blondes came off more disappointed than amazed at what the dog could do. Finally one of the blondes was sick and tired of waiting, she suddenly shouted out: "THAT’S IT! We’ll give this dog one more chance. We’ll throw him up in the air one more time and if he doesn’t fly we’re taking him back to the STORE!"
Q: What did the blonde say when the airplane began to shake? A: Must be an earthquake.
Blonde walks into a doctors office and says: "Doctor, what’s the problem with me? When I touch my arm, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my leg, ouch! it hurts... When I touch my head, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my chest, ouch! it really hurts!" The Doctor replies: "Your finger is broken."
Q: How do you drown a blond? A: Don't tell her to swallow.
A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library and with a screaming voice said, “I have a complaint!” “How can i help you?” said the librarian looking up at her. “I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!” Puzzled by her complain the librarian asked “What was wrong with it?” “It had way too many characters and there was no plot!” said the blonde. The librarian nodded and said, “Ahhh. So YOU must be the person who took our phone book."