They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
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Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
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Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes.
Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.
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Some say that Chuck Norris is the Stig.
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Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.
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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At night.
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Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote.
He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.
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Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
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Chuck Norris uses a gun to be humane.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
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