They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.
For fear of Chuck Norris, his shoes tie themselves.
Chuck Norris gets younger by the kill.
Chuck Norris can walk up a down elavator.
Chuck Norris can turn carbon paper into diamonds.
After Chuck Norris was born, he drove himself back home.
Chuck Norris can gargle with honey.
Chuck Norris was the Best Man at his own wedding.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.