Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
Chuck Norris can run so fast he can cause time travel.
It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
Chuck Norris walked his version of a 40-yard dash in 5.6 seconds; he was later told it was the Boston Marathon.
Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
Chuck Norris pitties Mr. T.
Chuck Norris bunked school one day. Till today that day is known as Sunday.
The first thing James Cameron saw when he reached the Challenger Deep was Chuck Norris snorkeling down to test his new watch.
Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.