Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
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Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross.
Just never his own.
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Chuck Norris has no freezer. He stares at food and they freeze with fear.
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Chuck Norris often walks on Bikini Atoll during tests to get a tan.
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Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
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When nature calls Chuck Norris hangs up.
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Chuck Norris can do push-ups in a sit-up position.
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Hurricanes are really just Chuck Norris breathing into the rain.
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The Matrix once had to take the red pill to escape from Chuck Norris.
It failed.
Nothing can escape from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
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Fire trucks and ambulances pull to the shoulder when chuck Norris drives by.
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