Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
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If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.
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Chuck Norris writes on pencils with paper.
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower in the morning to freshen up.
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Chuck Norris bit a spider once then it became Spiderman!
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What you call a wrecking ball, Chuck Norris calls a punching bag.
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Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a License to drive a car...
The car needs a special license to be driven by Chuck Norris.
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After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
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Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
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There was no volcanic eruption in Iceland - Chuck Norris opened the BBQ season.
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