Chuck Norris is what makes the Central Nervous System nervous
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Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
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Chuck Norris can strum your pain with his fingers, tell your whole life with his words – but mainly just kill you softly with his song.
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Chuck Norris can pop every kernel in the bag without burning one.
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Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
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Chuck Norris can listen to 24 hours worth of music and not move a single muscle.
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When Chuck Norris breaks a sweat... he tries to do it as quickly as possible so as not to hurt it.
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Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
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Nice guys finish last because bad guys run faster from Chuck Norris.
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The wrecking ball in the Miley Cyrus video isn't a wrecking ball it's one of Chuck Norris testicles.
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Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
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