Chuck Norris is what makes the Central Nervous System nervous
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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack.
His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
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Chuck Norris has clicked the unclickable button... twice
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Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
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Chuck Norris went for a swim in the ocean.
The sharks headed for land.
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When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
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Chuck Norris doesn't read books.
He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
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God created universe, Chuck Norris created God.
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Chuck Norris once shaved his beard.
People now call it Bigfoot.
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Before going to bed, the Boogeyman always checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday.
Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
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