Ghost Busters call Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck were in the movie Nightmare On Elm Street then it would be renamed nightmare on Chuck Norris Street, cuz nobody dared to get near him.
Chuck Norris' beard has it's own Social Security number.
Chuck Norris puts the 'laughter' in 'manslaughter'.
Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.
Time waits for no man.
Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris' muscles are so developed that he's had intellectual conversations with them.
No matter how fast you run, Chuck Norris will always walk faster.