Ghost Busters call Chuck Norris.
There was once a ship that wouldn't let chuck norris on board. It is now known as titanic
In "ring around the rosie", Chuck Norris does not fall down.
“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
Chuck Norris Avenged the Avengers.
Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
Chuck Norris doesn't age, he levels up!
When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
Chuck Norris has never won a single fight. Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.