Never ask Chuck Norris for an autograph.
Why?
Because Chuck's signature is a straight roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard.
They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
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America doesn't need a military...
We've got Chuck Norris
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When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
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Christano Roanaldo dives because he thinks of Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror, he gets jealous.
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When nature calls Chuck Norris hangs up.
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Rome wasn't built in a day because they didn't ask Chuck Norris for help.
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Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck.
There can only be 1 living legend.
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Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
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According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan.
When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
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