Chuck Norris froze hell.
Jason Bourne is Chuck Norris' daughter...
Chuck Norris went to the sun and spent two nights.
Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.
Chuck Norris caught them all with one PokeBall.
Chuck Norris knows who's buried in Grant's Tomb.
Chuck Norris won a game of chess with checker pieces.
After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. It was more "humane".
Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.