When Columbus discovered America, Chuck Norris has already worked there as Texas ranger.
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In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
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When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
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Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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Ali Baba said "Open sesame" to open the secret entrance to the treasure, but little did he know that saying "Open Chuck Norris" opens all doors.
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Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
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If you type Chuck Norris into Microsoft Word, the little paper-clip just hangs himself.
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Chuck Norris has never received an electricity bill, he powers everything with his rage
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Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
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Chuck Norris can paint himself into a corner and still get the job done.
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