When Columbus discovered America, Chuck Norris has already worked there as Texas ranger.
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Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
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Chuck Norris does not submit to homeland security, he IS homeland security.
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Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
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Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' Motto is: "The beard is mightier than the sword."
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The tides don't change because of the moon; the sea just wants to be as far away as possible from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
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The saying "Kill two birds with one stone" actually came from when chuck Norris downed two Peregrin Falcons with one roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris' beard can shave a razor.
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Chuck Norris really can get chicken from a tuna can.
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