A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
Chuck Norris can open PDF files with Microsoft Excel.
There is a plaque laid next to the remnants of the Titanic which reads, "Only Chuck Norris is unsinkable"
Chuck Norris once had a weak moment, just to know what it felt like.
Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
Barack Obama was elected president of the USA because Chuck Norris said so. He remind him of Trivette...
Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.
Chuck Norris does not fart, nothing escapes Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris CAN handle the truth.