When Chuck Norris wears a mood ring, it doesn't say whether he's happy or sad.
It says he's Chuck Norris.
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The only time Chuck Norris has ever faced a worthy opponent is when he looked at himself in the mirror.
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In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
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Rocky Balboa was a lucky man because Chuck Norris didn't pursue a boxing carreer.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris built the hospital in which he was born.
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Chuck Norris is another name for Terror.
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Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.
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If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
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How many push-ups can Chuck Norris do?
All of them.
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