When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
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When Chuck Norris sets his watch, he sets time itself.
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy.
"There were no survivors."
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When Chuck Norris goes skydiving at 10,000 feet he jumps into the plane... from the ground.
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Q: What happens when an unstoppable force meets an unmovable object?
A: Chuck Norris is clapping.
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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer.
Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who can write history of the future.
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When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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Chuck Norris sank the Titanic on a late afternoon swim.
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