Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
Chuck Norris climbed the stairway to heaven, and came back down again.
Chuck Norris is the greatest thing, period, despite his invention of sliced bread.
Cancer gets checked for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is a hunter. But Chuck Norris does not hunt. That implies the possibility of failure.
When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
The Titanic sunk because Chuck Norris ran into it during his swim.
Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
Freddy Krueger has nightmares of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.