Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
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If you took all the worlds Super Heroes and combined them, Chuck would still kill them instantly.
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Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
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Chuck Norris can flip a coin and make it land on both sides at the same time.
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Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
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Chuck Norris can paint himself into a corner and still get the job done.
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How long does it take Chuck Norris to get to Asia?
2 months...
How does he get there?
He walks.
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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower in the morning to freshen up.
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Jesus is the son of God.
God is the son of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris finished the Never Ending Story.
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