Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
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Chuck Norris made sick the healthy chocolate.
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If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much.
Chuck Norris throws down!
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Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
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Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
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When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons.
None of it is his own.
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Chuck Norris was asked to star in Night of the Living Dead but filming was ended after the zombies were to afraid to be roundhouse kicked in the face.
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
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Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris:
I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours.
Can you?
Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
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