Chuck Norris does not play computer games, he makes games play computer!
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Chuck Norris was once tested for steroids.
The results came back positive.
When confronted with this information, Chuck Norris chuckled and said, "Of course, what do you think they make steroids from?"
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Chuck Norris has the iPhone 5...he got it back in '84.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
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The burning bush that Moses spoke of was actually Chuck Norris's beard!
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Neil Armstrong was the first person to walk on the moon, Chuck Norris was the first person to walk on the sun.
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Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
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Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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Chuck Norris once joined the Army.
That's how the motto, "An Army of One" was created.
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