Chuck Norris can watch DVD's on a VCR.
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People say "bless you" when you sneeze because Chuck Norris might catch your soul.
It's a myth.
Chuck Norris can take your soul whenever he wants.
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Chuck Norris created the World Wide Web using a typewriter.
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Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
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The true reason why the Nazi's lost the war was because they stopped trying after they found out Chuck Norris had a summer home in Russia.
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There is no such thing as an endangered species, they are Chuck's likes and dislikes.
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Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics...
In the summer.
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Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
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Chuck Norris has 2 kids.
We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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Fire trucks and ambulances pull to the shoulder when chuck Norris drives by.
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Chuck Norris got into Cambridge... without any qualifications.
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