Earth is not spinning around the sun.
The sun is just desperately trying to keep a distance to Chuck Norris.
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What does the fox say?
Whatever the hell Chuck Norris tells him to.
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Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby.
Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
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Jurrasic Park is a second name for Chuck Norris' backyard.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is the four horsemen of the apocalypse!
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He opens the door then turns the handle.
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Chuck Norris does not wear a seatbelt and reclines his seat before takeoff and landing on an airplane because he can.
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Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.
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In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
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