Earth is not spinning around the sun.
The sun is just desperately trying to keep a distance to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can cut a saw with a wood board.
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Chuck Norris doesn't buy life insurance, life buys Chuck insurance.
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In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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The only apocolypse that can happen is if bogyman insults Chuck Norris.
The whole universe goes to hell.
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Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
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Why did we have a global recession?
Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
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Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris wins Clue in one guess.
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While we all get checked by the airport security, Chuck checks the airport security.
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Chuck Norris never swam.
Every time he was about to get in a pool the water ran away in terror!
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