Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
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Chuck Norris, Mr T and Arnold Swieznigger died in a plane crash they got to heavens door way and god asked them what there business is. Arnold replied "I want to be your right hand man".
Mr T said "I wanna be your left hand man".
Chuck Norris said "get the fuck out of my chair".
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If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
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Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
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There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
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Cement took a teaspoon of Chuck Norris to harden up!
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Chuck Norris once slapped a man into next week.
The man was missing for four and a half years.
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Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee.
Except Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris knows your reading this...
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Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life.
When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
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In 1945 Chuck Norris drank a Redbull and jumped out a plane. For image results, Google the word Hiroshima.
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