Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
Chuck Norris found the end of a rainbow. The leprachuan said he couldn't have the gold. So he roundhouse kicked him in the face.
Chuck Norris was bitten by a cobra, cobra died after 5 days.
50Cent used to be called DollarBill but Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked him to the face and now he's half the man he used to be.
Chuck Norris had a staring contest with a picture. And Won.
Chuck Norris' beard can etch a sketch a picture of chuck killing a man. When the last line is drawn, that man dies!
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he taught his parents to stay away from strangers.
When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord. He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!