When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.
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Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
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Once, Chuck Norris only filled his name in on the SAT.
He got a perfect score.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar.
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When Chuck Norris gets bitten by a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris.
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There will never be a zombie apocalypse, because when Chuck Norris bites zombies, they turn back into humans.
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Chuck Norris once played The Price Is Right.
The prices attempted to guess the numbers Chuck Norris was thinking of.
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You might kill two birds with one stone, but Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
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Chuck Norris can make you fold a Royal Flush.
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