When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
Chuck Norris can build a house from the roof down.
Chuck Norris is so hot he makes the sun sweat.
Chuck Norris once had a pet monkey...his name was KING KONG
Water needs safety arm bands when swimming with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
Sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
If you type Chuck Norris into Microsoft Word, the little paper-clip just hangs himself.
While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.
When the fire department catches fire, they call Chuck Norris.