Joke #864

They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a security system. Chuck Norris is a security system.
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Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
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Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
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Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls... He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
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Chucks Norris's mirror is scared to look at him.
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When somebody else yawns, Chuck Norris does not.
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Chuck Norris told his iPhone 2g it was a iPhone 4. He can now multi task and use face time.
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Chuck Norris became a firefighter, after hearing of his decision fire ceased to be an element.
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