Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Chuck Norris does not submit to homeland security, he IS homeland security.
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Chuch Norris stood next to a bear and was told he had to leave because the bear was scared.
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Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris.
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
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Water can't breath under Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris told you to jump off a bridge, would you?
Of course you would.
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Chuck Norris "Caught 'Em All " twice.
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Chuck Norris can tell you what a lethal injection feels like
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Chuck Norris... Chuck Norris... Chuck Norris... Okay, I've finished my morning prayers.
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Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
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