When Chuck Norris steps on a crack he breaks another persons mother's back.
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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Chuck Norris once made a crippled man run away.
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Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
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When Chuck Norris wears a mood ring, it doesn't say whether he's happy or sad.
It says he's Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can travel through time by running 88 miles per hour.
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Chuck Norris once stood on a bridge in London.
Then they wrote a song about it.
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When Chuck Norris breaks the speed limit, no one can put it back together again.
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Chuck Norris took a rocket science class but quit becaus it was too easy.
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They say, "You can't fight city hall", but Chuck Norris can.
It's not much of a fight....
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Chuck Norris once saw a video that takes 24 hours to watch...
He saw it 3 times a day.
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