Chuck Norris has no need to walk. The universe simply moves around him.
When you google up Chuck Norris, he googles you back for revenge.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
What came first, the chicken or the egg? Chuck Norris came first.
Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real. It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
Never tell Chuck Norris he lost the game because he will make you lose the game then roundhouse kick you in the face making you lose twice.
Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.
Chuck Norris cut's a knife with butter.
If Chuck Norris was here in the Philippines, there would be no hostage crisis. He eats hostage-takers for breakfast!
Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.