Chuck Norris sends paper letters through email.
Chuck Norris can turn carbon paper into diamonds.
No matter how fast you run, Chuck Norris will always walk faster.
If Chuck Norris were an Adam's Apple, he'd be in your throat right now.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
There's a medical term for those who willingly defy Chuck Norris... organ donors.
Right angles used to be called wrong angles until Chuck said, "I don't see anything wrong with them."
Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
Chuck Norris became a firefighter, after hearing of his decision fire ceased to be an element.