Chuck Norris sends paper letters through email.
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
Chuck Norris can bend light with a roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris can use a touch screen without touching it.
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck norris can fix a plumbers crack.
Chuck Norris once won a chess game after losing his king
Just the thought of using Chuck Norris in a war is considered a terrible crime against humanity.
Chuck Norris brings his fists to gunfights.
Chuck Norris once ate a whole bucket of sleepng pills and it managed to make him yawn.