Chuck Norris can hear your text messages.
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Chuck Norris can open PDF files with Microsoft Excel.
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Chuck Norris can shoot around a corner.
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Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
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When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
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We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
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Evolution ended the day Chuck Norris was born.
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Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.
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The best part of waking up is not the Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
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Chuck Norris can play volleyball with a bowlingball.
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Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row.
The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
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