When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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As an infant, Chuck Norris' parents gave him a toy hammer.
He gave the world Stonehenge.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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Chuck Norris CAN read Lady Gaga's poker face.
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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
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Chuck Norris once went to practice his golf swing at a driving range... his golf balls are now known as stars!
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Chuck Norris can throw a house through a window.
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Chuck Norris does not listen to lectures.
Lectures listen to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once beat the sun at a staring contest.
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When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror, he gets jealous.
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If you are stuck on a test and you don't know the answer to a question, write in Chuck Norris.
The answer is always Chuck Norris.
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