When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat. His body cries.
If you make a list of 10 things Chuck Norris cannot do, he will appear at your house and perform them all. Your life may be forfeit.
Teacher to student "Why is every answer on your test 'Chuck Norris'?" Student to teacher "Chuck Norris is the answer to all problems!"
When someone is in trouble it's a job for Superman, when Superman is in trouble it's a job for Chuck Norris.
Nobody has ever told Chuck Norris a yo-mama joke and lived to tell about it.
Suicide committed Chuck Norris.
Lou Gehrig considered himself the luckiest man on the face of the Earth, no one knew that it was because he was soon getting away from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can get a strike in bowling using a ping-pong ball.
Every bone inside Chuck Norris is his funny bone, cause he laughs wherever you hit him.
Chuck Norris can run a nuclear power station using a rowing machine.
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.