Chuck Norris does not need to freeze water to make ice, he just stares at water and scares it stiff.
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Chuck Norris got elected for president, even though he didn't run for anything.
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Chuck Norris has never used a question mark in his life.
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When Chuck Norris eats dinner at a restaurant, the wait staff tips him.
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Chuck Norris once went sky diving, he did not use a parachute.
The spot he landed on is now known as the Grand Canyon.
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Chuck Norris keyboard doesn't need a delete button.
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Chuck Norris is the only person to really have "Birthdays".
The rest of us have "Thank you Chuck for allowing me to live another year- days".
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A Klondike bar would do anything for a Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris crossed the road.
No one has ever dared question his motives.
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Every resturant has a drive thru when you're riding shotgun with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
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