Chuck Norris can tell you what a lethal injection feels like
Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth. The next day he won the lottery.
Chuck Norris's daughter lost her virginity, he got it back.
Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series. We know it as Forged in the fire.
Walker Texas Ranger wasn't an action crime drama, it was a documentary.
Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
Chuck Norris once jumped. Now we have seven Continents and a tilted planet.
Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear seatbelts. Seatbelts wear Chuck Norris.