The Twilight Zone enters the Chuck Norris Zone.
Chuck Norris can watch music.
Chuck Norris can speak braille.
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris does not go fishing, the fish surrender.
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
If looks could kill they would be called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
Why did we have a global recession? Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.