Chuck Norris can pull a hat out of a rabbit.
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Chuck Norris rejects your reality and substitutes it with his fist.
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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.
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Chuck Norris makes his own Girl Scout cookies using real Girl Scouts.
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When someone is in trouble it's a job for Superman, when Superman is in trouble it's a job for Chuck Norris.
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Walker Texas Ranger wasn't an action crime drama, it was a documentary.
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Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time.
He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
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Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
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Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Chuck Norris is the reason Pluto is no longer a planet.
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