Chuck Norris doesn't need twitter, he's already following you.
Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
The reason Waldo hides is because he saw Chuck Norris looking for him.
Rambo is simply Chuck Norris disguised as Sylvester Stalone playing tag.
Chuck Norris gives poison ivy a rash.
Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.
Chuck Norris finished the Never Ending Story.
Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.
The only reason world peace doesn't exist is because Chuck Norris doesn't feel like bringing peace to the whole world.
With just two toothpicks, a lightbulb, and his RoundHouse Kick, Chuck Norris can override the Pentagon's computer system.
When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.