They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
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Chuck Norris invented the Giraffe when he roundhouse kicked a spotted Horse in the chin.
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Chuck Norris doesn't die...he just sleep in the ground for a little bit.
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Chuck Norris was once part of a knock knock joke.
The Joke ended abruptly when after the first knock the door blew up killing the man behind it.
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When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
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Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey.
The country there now is only an impostor.
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The sun cannot look directly at Chuck Norris.
It must use specialized equipment just to gaze upon his silhouette
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When Chuck Norris goes to the cinema, he changes the movies with his remote control.
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Chuck Norris walks into a bar... the beer starts to run.
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Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
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