Three rednecks were working up on a cell phone tower: Cooter, Ronnie and Donnie.
As they start their descent, Cooter slips, falls off the tower and is killed instantly.
As the ambulance takes the body away, Ronnie says, "Well, shucks, someone should go and tell his wife."
Donnie says, "OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."
Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.
Ronnie says, "Where did you get that beer, Donnie?"
"Cooter's wife gave it to me," Donnie replies.
"That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you beer?"
"Well, not exactly", Donnie says.
"When she answered the door, I said to her, "You must be Cooter's widow."
She said, "You must be mistaken. I'm not a widow."
Then I said, "I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are."
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A man and a woman are lying in bed, watching the ceiling and keep quiet.
What are they thinking?
The woman thinks, "He keeps quiet.
He doesn’t want to talk.
May be he’s get tired of me.
He doesn’t love me anymore.
He’s probably got someone else.
I see.
We’ll have to separate each other."
The man thinks, "A fly. A fly on the ceiling.
Wow!
How keep it there and don’t fall?"
I am a marvelous housekeeper.
Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
Q. Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A. So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.
Genie: I will grant you two wishes.
Guy: two? It's always three, right?
Genie: look at your crotch.
Guy: Damn, that's a huge dick that I have now.
Genie: I've been doing this for centuries. I know my business.
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they?
A: His left hand and his right hand.
Vote:
Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"
There was an ad in the newspaper:
An agriculturist looks for a woman with a tractor.
The photo of the tractor is required.
How do some men define Roe vs. Wade?
Two ways to cross a river.
What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant?
Any place without a drive-up window.