A woman went shopping.
She walks to checkout counter and then the salesman packs all her groceries: milk, cheese, orange juice, half of bread, bar of soap, toothpaste...
All of a sudden the salesman asks her:
"You're single, aren't you?"
A bit surprised woman smiles and answers:
"That's right, but how did you guessed that?"
"Because you're so ugly."
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Do you know why bankers are good lovers?
They know first hand the penalty for early withdrawal.
Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman.
The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one has to drop off, otherwise they are all going to fall.
They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech.
She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, and for men in general, without ever getting anything in return.
As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping their hands.
There were 11 people – ten men and one woman – hanging onto a rope that came down from a helicopter.
They all decided that one person should get off, because if they didn’t, the rope would break and everyone would die.
No one could decide who should go, so finally, the woman gave a really touching speech saying how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children, giving in to men, and not receiving anything in return.
When she finished speaking, all the men started clapping.
Knock knockrn
Who's there?
Woman who?
Wo-man you where so nice to let me tell you this joke
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Man.
Man who?
Man you where so nice to let me tell you this joke.
Vote:
Q: What happens to the man who lost his whole left side of his body?
A: He is all right now.
A man has came over to his wife in a request.
She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants.
3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.
Q. What do you call a sensitive, intelligent man?
A. An oxymoron.
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One. Men will screw anything.
Vote:
A man walks into a bar and says "I just got back from the battered woman's shelter, and boy are my arms tired."
Everyone laughed.
The man sat at the end of the bar drinking alone.
He was proud of the fine craftsmanship of the shelves he put up in the shelter's pantry, regardless of what others may think.
