Chuck Norris went up the creek without a paddle... or a canoe.
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Chuck never auditioned for Walker Texas Ranger, a camera crew turned up at his house and secretly filmed him.
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When Chuck Norris crosses the pacific, swimming, sharks hear the "Jaws" music.
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Chuck Norris does not open doors.
Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him
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Chuck Norris won the Boston marathon in New York.
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Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
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Beetlejuice is afraid to say Chuck Norris 3 times.
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The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
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huck Norris was supposed to star in the tv show 'Man vs Wild', but the network did not want kids thinking 'lava is safe to eat'.
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