Lactose is Chuck Norris intolerant.
Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
Chuck Norris doesnt' walk away from explosions, explosions walk away from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can't be racist, because to him there are no people, just light and dark targets.
When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier. In half.
Chuck Norris once won an underwater breathing contest with a fish.
Chuck Norris once played himself in Russian Roulette, and he won. No Questions asked.
Chuck Norris was a comedian, but everyone started to die of laughter.
hen Chuck Norris goes fishing he stands at the edge of the water and says: "Don`t make me go in there to get you".