Rome wasn't built in a day because they didn't ask Chuck Norris for help.
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Chuck Norris can surf on lava.
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Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.
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Chuck Norris invented the printing press by putting two pieces of blank paper together.
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Chuck Norris was a pokemon card, until they took it out of the market cause the Chuck Norris card was level infinity.
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The world won't end in 2012, it will end when Chuck Norris gets bored of it.
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Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby.
Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people.
It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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Chuck Norris eats granite and drinks lava for his lunch.
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Google is setting up a new search engine to answer life's difficult and most complex questions with the response always being the same... Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris dosn't have a star on Hollywood Blvd he has a constellation.
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