Allstate gets insurance from Chuck Norris, because even Allstate needs to be in good hands.
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Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.
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Q: What do a bungee jump cord and a hooker have in common?
A: If the rubber breaks you're screwed.
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Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
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Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
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Chuck Norris once created a time machine and had to fight himself.
We call it The Big Bang.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a security system. Chuck Norris is a security system.
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Chuck Norris doesn't smoke cigars.
He smokes smoke grenades.
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Chuck Norris goes killing.
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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares.
Actually he can also blow your face.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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